Bean's Blog

One Month

2009-10-10T13:20:00.000-07:00

One month ago today this is where I was. In room #211, the same room Jill was born in.

We were supposed to be at the hospital at 8AM to be induced, but we were late of course. We had to stop for gas.

Being induced had not been my plan. I really wanted to go on my own this time, but I guess Chase had other plans. I had been contracting for two+ weeks on and off. At my last two appointments the doctors said they didn't think I'd make it to the next appointment and that scheduling the induction was just in case. Well it was a good thing they did, I don't think my little man was planning on coming any time soon. He was pretty comfortable in there, and now as I look back I was pretty happy with him in there too. Yes those last few weeks I was so anxious to meet him, but I felt great and loved being pregnant with my boy.

Once nurse Judy got me settled in my room Dr. J checked me at 9am and I was 4cm and 100% effaced, all ready to go! She decided to go ahead and break my water. It feels so icky being wet. I see chicks on TV (too much of TLC's "A Baby Story") walking the halls after their water breaks and I don't get it? Mine gushed too much with both kids; they'd have to follow behind me with a mop! So that part wasn't very enjoyable, but I knew that brought me one step closer to meeting my son. Once my water was broken real contractions started on their own.

I was happy to know that my body was ready.

RN students from a local college were following nurses that day. My nurse Jenny was working with a student named Krista. I was asked if Krista could start my IV and since by brother is working towards nursing school I thought of him and agreed. Well that was the most painful part of my labor and delivery. Krista's teacher walked in as she began and she was asking her questions while she was stabbing me, not very reassuring.

By 10:30 I was at 5 cm and really feeling the contractions. With Jill after receiving my epidural I was able to relax and went quickly from there. So I decided to go ahead and get the epidural. They started pitocin at the same time. By 1:40 I was at 6cm and at 2:10 I was 7cm, I knew it wouldn't be long. At around 2:30 I started feeling the contractions again and then a lot of pressure. My nurse had me roll over and said if I still felt them in 10 min she'd increase the epidural. Well 10 minute later the pressure was really getting strong so she called for the anesthesiologist.

Then I had to push. I asked her to check me and at 2:52 (the time Jill was born) she confirmed I was ready to go. But as luck would have it, my doctor wasn't there, she was at the office. So I waited and waited, it was challenging, but I like a good challenge!
Since Eric had prior experience (he delivered Jillene), Dr. J let him get suited up and deliver Chase as well. After less than two minutes of pushing E got to be the first one to touch him and watch him take his first breath. At 3:28 we welcomed Chase Alexander into this world. Eric put him on me right away and it was just amazing. His birth was such a peaceful and joyful experience. It was perfect from start to finish.

I was so unbelievably happy!

Since coming home Chase has been a great baby. He is very easy going, cries only if he needs to be changed or if he's hungry. He eats like a champ, latched on great from the start. He is a great sleeper too. He's asleep between 8-9 PM and sleeps until around 12-1. He eats and is back out within 30min and then sleeps until 5-6, then sleeps again until 8-9. Then he's up for the morning. He started smiling and cooing and is especially happy in morning. I can't get enough of him, I could hold him all do; I think I did the first few weeks!!! He loves taking baths and sucks his thumb. He doesn't really like the paci or drinking from the bottle (BM), but since I have to go back to work, bottles are something he has to get used to. This breaks my heart; I'd give anything to be home with my kids...sigh.

Jill was so happy to meet "broder".

She loves him so much and wants to do everything for him. She loves holding him and even changed his poopy diaper! She loves him a little too much sometimes, but we are working on that.

Have I mentioned that she named him? Chase was a name on the list, along with many others. She heard us talking names one day and declared his name to be Chase. We weren't sold right away. One day Daddy and his friend Nick were hanging out with her by the swing set and again discussing names...this made her very unhappy since she had already told us his name. On that day she declared his full name to be "Chase Alawander" as she says it, Chase Alexander to us! We are now hooked and according to her "broder told me that's his name" so how could we name him anything else!

We are so happy to have this little boy home! This is one of my favorite pictures of him. He had his first photo shoot with Sue at 15 days old.
I'll be posting more of the pictures she took in the next post.

Chase,
I'm so in love you baby! You are amazing and I look forward to each and every day with you. I'm so proud to be your momma and I'm thrilled to have a son!

Tomorow, tomorrow...

2009-09-07T15:42:00.000-07:00

my due date's tomorrow

it's only hours away!!!!

(you know, to the Annie tune)

(5 weeks)

From this to this in nine short months

(39 weeks)

The thing is it doesn't feel like hours away, it feels like it'll never get here!!!

I really can't believe I'm still preggers, with Jill I was holding a two week old baby when her due date rolled around. If he hasn't made his appearance by Thursday, I'm set to be induced...... or shall I say he's getting evicted!!!

I didn't really want it to happen that way, but I want to meet him and that seems like the only option at the moment, I'm desperate to meet my boy!!!

I still feel great, actually better these past few weeks since he dropped. I had major back pain for most of this pregnancy but that's gotten so much better lately. Maybe that's why he's still hanging out, he knows I feel great. I even still have ankles and toes, and I can even see them (well kind of!)

I'm headed out to start walking, maybe that will help...wish my luck!!!

CHASE COME OUT AND MEET YOUR FAMILY!!!!!!

Love ya Little Man,

Momma

Hours? Days? or Weeks?

2009-08-30T17:34:00.000-07:00

It could be any of those before I meet my boy. His due date is in 9 days, but at this point with Jill she was already in my arms. He's already baked 8 days longer then his sister. I know every pregnancy is different but I just can't wait any longer...I want to meet my boy!

At my doctors appointment on Thursday I was 1-2 CM and at zero station and the doctor said he didn’t expect to see me next week, and that sounded perfect to me too, I’d rather not see him either! I’m feeling so anxious and ready. I’ve been cleaning floors every night, I have all the laundry done, I’m done with BR work and I have weeks 1-4 of lesson plans done for my students. Now I just need my boy in my arms. I woke up Thursday morning at 4:30 feeling what I thought were real contractions. I’ve had BH Contractions for a while now, but these were different. Major cramps very low and into my upper thighs. They stopped me in my tracks. There were three good ones about 6-8 min apart and then they became sporadic. I went on to school where they continued but not getting any stronger. Friday was the same. I woke up sporadically through the night and they continued that way all day, but that was it. They didn't get stronger or closer together. This weekend they pretty much stopped. I've tried eating really spicy things, mac-n-cheese with A1 sauce, we at the Mexican restaurant I ate at the night before Jill was born (even had the same thing) and nothing. I've been walking, I even climbed about a million (OK it felt that way) stairs at the water park today to take Jill on a tube slide. Getting my butt into the back of a double tube must have been a funny sight, it was pretty challenging but I did it and we had a blast!

So I guess I will have another week with my students. The plan is for Friday to be my last day since my due date will be the following Tuesday and school is closed Monday for labor day. At this point I think I may still be pregnant that week too. It feels like he'll never get here. I now I probably sound silly since I still have over a week until I'm due. I'm just so anxious. Since Jill came before I expected her too I never had the "when is the baby coming" feelings, she surprised me (as she still does daily!), so I guess that's why this feels weird to me.

I just want my boy!!!!

Chase,
I can’t wait to meet you. You are so close yet you seem so far. As I rest my hands on you I feel you move, but I want to feel you moving out here. Your sister can’t wait to meet you too. I think she may be more anxious then daddy and I. I can’t wait to see what you look like, hear your cry and see those cute little toes. The closer it gets to the end the longer it seems like it’s taking. You are the missing part to our family puzzle and we need you to come join us and make us complete. The Grandfathers (or farters to your sis), Grammy, Mimi and Pop Pop are so excited to meet you too. Your Aunt Rachele and all your uncles are waiting too (there are so many of them you'll have an endless supply!) We love you big boy, please come meet your momma! I know I've asked you to wait September for the last nine months (because I love sapphires) but if your ready come on!!! August is a good month too, I'm sure that birthstone is pretty!

I love brother...

2009-06-30T06:34:00.000-07:00

Brother loves me

We're a happy family

With a great big hug and a kiss from me to him

Won't he say he loves me too!
This is the song Jillene has been singing. She is so excited about having a brother and just can't wait to meet him. Every morning they have their special time together. I'm so thankful for this summer, it gives Jill all the time she wants to spend with him without the rush of tiring to get ready to be somewhere each morning. She wakes up, tells me good morning and kisses me and then goes straight for the belly! She tells him good morning, hugs him, lays across my belly just waiting for him to kick her. She gets so excited every morning like it was the first time she felt him. She tells him what they are going to do that day, or what cartoons they are going to watch. She always asks him if the plans/show is OK with him, pauses a bit and then says "OK brother", and says brother is excited too. I just can't wait to see them together! She will be the first one in the room with us once little man is born and will get all the time she wants alone with him.

As a mom I feel so happy/proud that I can give my daughter a sibling. It makes me cry just thinking of them together. There are times that I am sad that the days of just me and my girl are almost over, but then she walks up and touches her brother and tells him she loves him and I know she wouldn't have it any other way. I hope the love she has for him know never fades, I pray it grows and grows. I have made sure that this summer if full of wonderful memories for Jill. She and I are doing many special things together, just she and I...I'll post about those adventures later.

Today also makes 30 weeks, 3/4 of the way there, he'll be here before we know it. We go for a 3D ultrasound tomorrow. I'll post pictures and maybe even belly shots too. Next Sunday I'm having real belly pictures done and then the next week is Chase's baby shower. Jill calls it brother's party or Chase's party and is so excited to be a part of it. She can't wait to go. She always looks at the pictures from her baby shower and comments on the smiles on every ones faces (especially mommy's). She knows we're all smiling because we were soooooo excited that she was coming and she wants to be smiling at brother's shower so he knows how happy she is that he is coming!!!!

Peek a Boo Brother

(see her peeking around him?...too cute)

***Disclaimer...

I can't believe I'm posting pictures of me in a bathing suit, normally I wouldn't do this not preggers, but I just love love love my belly this pregnancy and I actually like what I look like in a swim suit now! OK maybe the hormones are making me crazy, but for now I'm liking my preggers self!

The Paci Fairy

2009-06-23T13:59:00.000-07:00

I want to start by saying how proud I am of my little “big” girl. It’s seems like the day she turned three she really blossomed into a little girl and grew out of the toddler stage. She is talking in more complete sentences, I mean she did before but now there is more description and explanation in them. We have real conversations now, she asks great questions and I just love watching her learn. She is working on the days of the week and uses "today", "yesterday" and "tomorrow" correctly. She knows it's cold in the winter and hot in the summer (that's all she needs to know in FL) and knows that when it's "summa time" we don't have to go to school and get to be together ALL day!!! We both love SUMMA TIME!!!

She surprises me everyday…and the biggest surprise was giving up her beloved paci. I know, I know…we should have done this way before three but we didn’t. She did many other things early and this was her one thing she was hanging on to, her comfort and I wasn’t ready to take it until she was ready to give it.

So to prepare for giving up the paci, I started talking to her about the “Paci Fairy”. Yes I created an imaginary fairy that comes and takes pacis to babies and gives the child giving them up a big surprise. What surprise you ask??? Well you get anything you ask for. We walked the toy isles looking at toys that where worth giving the paci for, she found many she liked but none worth the paci. I let it go, talking about it often, but not pushing the matter. At her three year check up her doctor suggested lollypops! That sounded good for a while, but then that too wasn’t worth the paci.

Well in the mean time, for her birthday my family and I pitched in together to but her a playset for the backyard. The one she got from her uncles for her first birthday was just way too small this year (but still perfect for little man). So it arrived the week before her birthday and we were just waiting for everyone to have a day off (at the same time...that never happens) to get it put together. Well E’s brother surprised her and came down from NC for her party (May 2nd) and would be here for the weekend. So Sunday her Daddy, Grampa, Uncle Jassan, Uncle Nick and daddy’s friend Nick spent the afternoon putting the beloved playset together.

While this was happening Aunt Lisa and I did all we could to keep her from looking out back. When we ran out of things to do inside we decided to go to Walmart. As we walked in Jill saw a playset outside. “Momma,” she said, “if I give my pacis to the Paci Fairy will she bring me a big girl slide and big girl swing?” OMG I couldn’t believe my ears…she was actually suggesting own her own to give them up. “YES, YES, YES Jill she can bring a slide and swing” (little did she know they are already in the backyard!!!). She got so excited and couldn’t wait to get home.

When we got there I gave her a baggie and she went around collecting all her pacis. We took them to the mailbox, she put them in (another shock) and pushed the flag up and yelled “Paci Fairy come get my pacis and bring me a big girl slide and big girl swing!!!”.

Here she is with the bag of pacis she collected, so excited to give them to the paci fairy.

She put them in the mailbox with a smile on her face.

Gotta put the flag up and yell "Paci Fairy come get my pacis!!!!"

TA-DA!!!!!!

We went back in to eat lunch and while Aunt Lisa kept her occupied I went and got the pacis and put the flag down. After lunch she went to check and saw the flag was down and got so excited (yet another shock…I expected a breakdown) and wanted to go look in the backyard.

She ran in and to the back window to find everyone hard at work on ht playset. Man I wish I had a picture of the look on her face…it was priceless. It was dark when it was finally finished but she waited paitentialy with her My size Barbie she named “Me” that she got from Miss Josie for her birthday ready to try out her new slide. Uncle Nick caught her and ‘Me” as they came down the slide, he helped them both cross the monkey bars and pushed them in the swing (after we tied the ropes around “Me’s” arms). She came in so tuckerd out, she showered and cried less then ten minutes for the paci and was out. Somewhere during that time she told the paci fairy to come get her slide and swing and bring back the pacis, but come morning she was relived to see her playset still there. She said “I no want paci fairy to come get my slide and swing, she can have my pacis!” Another shock to me and another proud moment!!! I have told her so many times lately how proud I am of her, she is such a big girl!

She did ask for it the next few days in her car seat but I gave her a peppermint or lollypop and she was good as gold. The 2nd night she asked for the paci a few times, but there were no tears and by the 3rd night she asked once and then remembered the paci fairy had them and laid right down. It’s been so much easier then I could have ever imagined, I’m a proud momma!!!

Mother's Day

2009-05-19T10:48:00.000-07:00

I awoke to a kick…a kick from my little man. This is the first time he’s woken me up this way (not the last I’m sure).

I think this was his way of being the first to wish me a happy mother’s day.

Once Jill woke up we hung out in bed watching cartoons while E made breakfast. We enjoyed scrambled eggs, bacon and a bagel outside on the porch. After breakfast we put on our swimsuits and headed back outside to lounge by/in the pool all day. It was a perfect relaxing day of fun! After soaking up the rays, we headed in to shower and get ready for diner at my favorite restaurant, Giordano’s. They make the best pizza in the world, no joke! Once home, Jill and I headed to bed to finish the day as it began, in bed watching cartoons, gotta love Scooby Doo!

Jillene thanks for making me a mommy and making my day the best ever!
Little Man I can’t wait to share this special day with you too next year, it’ll be twice the fun!

Oh I almost forgot, I could see my belly move for the first time too. As I laid in the sun you could see it jumping all about. Jill and I floated together in the pool and she was facing me laying back on my legs so her butt was at the base of my belly and he kicked her butt! She thought it was so funny. Then in bed before she fell asleep she could see my belly moving too, she was wide eyed and amazed!!! I can’t wait to see them together!

My little lady

2009-05-19T10:26:00.000-07:00

My baby has become a little girl.......

It's bitter sweet!

Happy 3rd Birthday Bean!!!!

Before I begin I must warn you that this isn't the happy post about her best birthday ever.

This really was the best year and party, but the day of her birthday was hard for me (and her too). I'm sure hormones have a lot to do with it...but preggers or not it was a rough day;

here's why:

This was the first (and hopefully last) year that I was not able to be home with her on her birthday. Schools are out of substitute money therefore we can’t miss school unless its an emergency. With little man on the way, I’ve already missed too many days/hours lately. It makes it hard on the rest of my team (we have to split the kids up between the other teachers in my grade level). So I thought bringing cupcakes to her at school (while my students were at PE) would be the next best thing. I’m glad I went but I never realized how hard that would be on Jill (and me too) when it was time for me to leave. She broke my heart as she begged me to take her with me. She begged me not to leave her on her birthday and promised she’d be good if I took her with me. Did she think I was leaving her because she isn’t good? I explained I had to go back to work and that I’d be back soon, but nothing helped. Her teacher had to pry her off me, kicking and screaming and begging me not to go and saying how much she loved me. I felt like the biggest piece of ****, the worst mommy ever…I just wanted to kick and scream and cry too!!! I went back to school a wreck. How could it be her third birthday and I’m not with her (and to think I’m about to do this all over again with little man).

I know this is normal for a lot of moms, but I don’t want this to be normal for me, I had a baby because I wanted to be with her, raise her and teach her. Just yesterday she sang me a song I didn’t know she knew and that broke my heart. I should be the one teaching her songs, I should KNOW what songs she knows. I didn’t teach her her ABC’s, colors or how to count...none of it. That’s my job and it’s so not fair that someone else gets to do it. I couldn’t help but cry, I was an emotional wreck!!! I can’t miss any more.

Everyone said it gets easier with time, but they lied. Every time she cries for me when I leave it breaks my heart. I know what those teachers are thinking, even if they are the greatest teacher, no one likes a cry baby and I know she cries for me everyday. When I pick her up the afternoon teachers say that when she wakes up from her nap she realizes where she is and that I’m not there and it starts again.

I went to daycare as a kid (only for one year when I was 4) and I remember that feeling I’d get when my mom would leave, it never got better, I hated everyday of it. The school was fine and I had friends but I ONLY wanted my mom and only she could make me better. I thought that Jill would be adjusted and used to going before she could really “remember”, but she remembers things now and I know she’ll remember this at that makes me cry even more.

I can’t take this, especially x2.

Jill was born at 2:52pm and I was not with her…I wanted to scream! (little man better be born in the evening so I can ALWAYS be with him, no wait then I’ll feel guilty for being with one and not the other…man this just sucks!!!)

Here she is enjoying her cupcake...she loved them!

All was well until she knew I was leaving...I hate this, I want to be a SAHM!!!!!!

So anyone know the lottery numbers so I can quit my job?

Boy, oh Boy...

2009-04-19T13:50:00.000-07:00

WE ARE HAVING A BOY!!!!!

I can't believe it but it's true.... I'm going to have a son!

It was a total shock, I thought for sure Jill had been right about having a sister, of course I knew it was 50/50, but for some reason I believe her. When he showed us he was a "he" I just couldn't believe it. The look on Eric's face was priceless, he was SO excited to be having a son.

We didn't get a picture of us face, there is only one thing he wanted to show us:-) So I go back in two weeks for another ultrasound, so hopefully we'll get a good look at his face then and I'll post pictures.

His heart rate was 146 and he is measuring 10oz.

Different but the Same

2009-04-15T12:26:00.000-07:00

The title makes me laugh! I love it when someone says something like..."I have that same shirt except mine is blue, not pink, and mine has a long sleeves, not short, and mine has more buttons" and you are left thinking well then that isn't the same shirt at all. I guess that's what I've been thinking about this pregnancy. There are so many things this pregnancy has in common with my first, yet many differences too!

I found out I was pregnant both times on Friday the 9th, with Jill it was September 9th, with this one January 9th. I always felt Jill move for the first time each day around 10AM and always on my right side. I started feeling this baby move consistently last Monday April 6th (17w6d) and it was 10:10 and on my right side and each day since it's been the same (Daddy felt the baby too on Wednesday and then Aunt Ra Ra on Thursday!!!). We found out Jill was a girl 4 days after Christmas and will find out about this one 4 days after Easter.

With Jill I had none of the typical pregnancy symptoms, no morning sickness, no heartburn, no mood swings...it was the perfect pregnancy, I was happy all the time. This baby made me sick from week 6-9, and then a crazy rash that made me itch from week 11-15. And don't ask my poor husband about mood swings, let's just say he's been very understanding!

I just wonder now if they will have the BIG question in common...will they both be girls or is it time to introduce some blue into the house??? Tomorrow is the big day and I'm so excited and sad at the same time. Not sad like I want to cry, but sad that the dreaming and imnagining will be over. Today I can wonder what it'd be like to have a girl and a boy, or two girls. Or if I'll have two little dresses to buy next Easter or a cute little sweater vest to match Jill's dress. I'm so excited to KNOW who is in there, yet the what if's will be over. I totally WANT to know, don't get me wrong, it's just reality that tomorrow changes things. Jill has ALWAYS said this baby IS a girl, so we keep saying "she", I wonder if she's right..and if she isn't I'm going to have a very sad little girl! Eric and I will be exicted either way. Jill and I will be going shopping after the ultrasound so I'll post pictures of the baby's clothes tomorrow. Will they be pink or blue???

Kick me Baby!!!!

2009-04-07T14:14:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday 3/28 (16w5d) we were visiting on of our favorite places and took a break to enjoy some yummy grapes when I felt something. It wasn't really a kick or a flutter but more of a push from the inside, nothing like the first time I felt Jill. I wasn't sure if it really was the baby. I wanted to feel it so bad I wasn't sure if I was imaginig things.

Then on Tuesday I had a doctor's appointment and Jill, E and Grammy got to come. My doctor (who also delivered Jill) Let Jill use the wand to find the heartbeat. They searched all over my mid belly, but didn't find it right away like they had before. The doctor tried off to the right side (kind of near my hip bone) and there it was!!! That happened to also be exactly where I had felt the push:) So I'm now convinced that was the baby. We were having such a great day that I'm sure the baby just wanted me to know she/he was enjoying themself also.

Invitation!!!

2009-04-03T02:40:00.000-07:00

We love love love Wee Little Designs and will never get cards anywhere else again. Jamie is so awesome to work with and makes the most perfect cards. Here is the invitaion she made for us this year...

We are so happy, isn't it just amazing???

Jill did so awesome having her picture taken this year, she is such a big girl these days. She posed just as the lady asked and smiled right on cue. Every picture came out perfect the first time. This was the easiest visit yet...now next year with two I'm sure will be different:) But I can't wait.

Land of Polk A Dots

2009-03-21T17:38:00.000-07:00

Today our family of

took a plane ride over to the next town over to enjoy lunch with Aunt DeeDee.

We wanted to do something fun since Daddy FINALLY had a day off.

The FOUR of us...

(this is the run way we landed on and just happened to be then number of people in the plane!)

Daddy

AKA Pilot E...I mean Echo (that's pilot talk:)

Mommy
(see I wasn't scared...OK we were still on the ground!)

Jillibean

sporting her own headset the world's greatest Daddy bought her

and eating popcorn...the girl couldn't be happier!!!

and Baby Bean #2

(this was the baby's first plane ride...no kicks so I think the baby liked it too)

So why is the title Land of Polk A Dots? Well that's the first thing that came to mind as I enjoyed the beautiful view. The area we live in is FULL of lakes, big, round, gorgeous lakes.

It looks like the land of Polk A Dots!

I've said I'd like to live further north where there are seasons, where the leaves change color and where it's actually cold at Christmas.

But today as I looked out my window I realized how lucky were are to live in such a beautiful place..I think I kind of like it here:)

What an amazing place God's created. His view is spectacular!!!

We even saw Grammy's house from up above!

It's the one on the main road (running from top to bottom) with the pool and the "L" shaped driveway.

Daddy was such a great pilot he put Jill to sleep with his superb flying skills.

We love you Pilot Daddy and we're sooo proud of you for living your dream!!!

Bean or Blob

2009-03-03T15:36:00.000-08:00

Introducing Bean# 2

or is it a blob???

Just kidding!!! Well last Thursday we all got to see the bean growing in my belly. Jill was so quite and just gazed at the monitor in amazement. We heard the strong heartbeat, at 160 bpm, which I'm told means it's a girl (but who really knows but HIM). For Jill's sake I'm hoping it is a girl since she wants a sissy so bad and I think we have settled on a girls name but have no idea about a boy. E and I would be happy either way, and we'd have 20 weeks to prepare Jill, but man would she be the happiest girl ever to get a sissy!

I found out today I my follow up appointment that I'm starting this pregnancy 16lbs more than when I started with Jill, this shocked me!!! I didn't think that I was that much bigger now:( I've also gained 4 lbs in 2 weeks which makes no sense since I've been really good, especially staying away from sweets. I'll keep working on being good...my goal is to not gain any before the next appointment..think it's possible?

Tomorrow

2009-02-25T15:26:00.000-08:00

I can't wait until tomorrow. At 2pm Thursday, we get to see the first glimpse of the little bean growing in my belly and I'm so excited. Eric and Jillene will be there too (of course) and I can't wait to see the look on Jillene's face when she sees her "sissy" for the first time. She insists it's a girl and Eric thinks it's boys, yes the "s" was no mistake. He's always thought he'd have a girl then twin boys. Lord help me if he's right:)

I went for my first appointment last Tuesday the 17th. Everything went well and to calm my fears of the "M" word (I dare not say it), she said she would try to find the heart beat. I was 9 weeks and my doctor said to not worry if she couldn't find it because it was still early, but within seconds she found it. It was loud and clear and beating strong. After finding it quickly, she moved it around and heard it again. Before I could comment about the baby moving a lot for being so small, she looked at the nurse and asked her to schedule an ultrasound. She assured me all was OK, she just wanted an ultrasound to get a better idea of how many weeks I was (I'm not completely sure of my LMP).

The next day one of my friends was sharing with her doctor about my visit. Her doctor seems to think I'm going for an ultrasound because there is probably more than one in there?!?! Eric and now her too. Then today another wonderful friend says she had a dream about twin boys?!?!

So we'll see tomorrow if I'll be keeping my sanity (with one baby) or losing my mind (with two).
**OK if it is two, I know I'll be fine (and probably really happy) after I wake up from fainting!**

Emotional

2009-02-16T18:11:00.000-08:00

This weekend has been full of such great news (and a little worry, but I'm sure that will be OK) and with it brings so many emotions. Emotions now just seem to make me cry. So as I danced with Jill to Wide Open Spaces, the song I always sang when I was preggers with her, I was thinking about her growing up and wishing she is blessed with friends as incredible as I have been blessed with.

Then I start thinking and of course crying:)

I LOVE my friends so much it hurts sometimes. Some are near, some are far. Some old friends and some brand new. I wondered just recently how/why I was blessed with so many BEST friends, I was even just given a new one. My mom always said you can count your true friends on one hand, and my hand is now full:) I guess god knew I needed one more, I didn't know I needed another, but can't imagine the days without her!

They've been there forever, and gone through so many changes with me.

Thank god for those events that just happened to bring us together,

even those forced upon us:)

(The song "I need you now" just started playing...more tears)

They were there for all the important things in my life.

We love like sisters. And I love their sisters like sister too:)

To Jill they are family (again I'm crying!)

I just can't imagine life without each of them. I'm such a dork and love them all so much I took something to remind me of each of them with me to my first doctor's appointment with baby #2. I was wearing the shirt Meghan gave me, the jacket Desiree gave me, the ring Kristin and I both have, the necklace Robin gave me with Jillene's picture in it and Jen and I went for pedicures and a yummy lunch afterwards.

Man I love my friends, I hope Jill is blessed with friends as wonderful as mine.

I love you guys!!!!!!!

I'm so Happy

2009-02-15T09:36:00.000-08:00

...Happy, Happy, Happy!!!!

OK maybe happy isn't the right word...um...ECSTATIC yeah yeah that's the word!!!!!

My friend rocks and that's all I can say. She knows show she is, she knows how much I love her and she knows I couldn't be happier. Man I love it when "he" calls me!!!!

XOXOXO you're the best, and in Jillene's words "we love you anything!!!!"

AND there is more great news...

CONGRATULATIONS Aunt DeeDee and Miro, well I guess he's Uncle Miro now!

Today on a romantic picnic he proposed and made my sister (from another momma) the happiest chick ever:) She got a big, fat, shiny rock too!!!!

WOW what a great day, I'm so happy for my girls...Love you both

Angel Babies

2009-02-05T16:52:00.000-08:00

On 1/17 I had posted some exciting news and then removed it today. I'm so sad that I have to write this...but a dream was lost, not forever but for now. My secret got out last Friday 1/30 and I called her that afternoon and said I hope I didn't jynx myself, watch something bad happen this weekend. And it did, just not to me. It started Sat 1/31 and her Dr's nurse confirmed Monday what she already suspected. They told her it must have been a false pregnacy, but how can 5 at home PT and another at the Dr just 2 wks before all be false? It just doesn't make sense. We were gonna do this together, I was giving her the craddle and bassinet, they are/were her's. Why? Then just yesterday two other bloggers, friends of Steph's, lost their babies too, what is happening?

Oh sweet baby in my belly please stay where you are, your sissy just can't wait to meet you, and I don't want to break her sweet little baby heart. She "loves you anything" please come and meet her (in 7mths), I know you'll love her!

Great bloggy giveaways

2009-01-26T17:04:00.000-08:00

Can you believe one of my favorite bloggers, Stephanie at Adventures in Babywearing, is giving away a gift I just gotta have...a sling!!! I can't wait to meet my new little bundle and I especially can't wait to wear her. Yes I said her since according to Jill it's a girl, her sissy, and since she "asked" Santa for a baby and got it, I'm thinking he probably gave her her choice and made it a girl, but we'll see. Either way I can't wait to get a sling and I just hope I win!!! Stephanie's first sling was from Kimz Kreations and Kim is so awesome that she is letting Steph give one away. Please please please let it be for me:)

Today makes seven weeks too, and this week has been better than last, thank goodness. With Jill I didn't have any morning sickness, heartburn, moodiness...nothing, I was sooo lucky. Well last Thursday the 15th, I realized I wasn't going to be as lucky this time around. For almost a soild week, morning, noon and night I felt terrible. "Morning" sickness just isn't the right word, it's more like ALL DAY sickness. It's been better, I just hope the worst is over. It's hard to stand in front of 20 kids and pretend like you feel good, I'm not a good faker, but I survived (and lost 5 lbs). Jill is so cute and excited about the baby (her sissy). She talks to my belly every morning and even came in the other day, lifted my shirt and raspberried my belly just like her Grampa did to her when she was in there. It was the cutest thing, I wish I had the camera ready!

Baby Bean we can't wait to meet you and if you are not Jill's sissy, sorry for calling you a girl:) We love you!

Jill's late Christmas Present....

2009-01-09T15:20:00.000-08:00

just arrived. I guess if you ask Santa and you are a really good girl you (or your mom) will get what you ask for:) Oh my gosh..... I don't know if I'm going to scream, cry or laugh...but I am going to but a sling! Nonny & Boo here I come (actually I've already been there!)

Merry (late) Christmas

2008-12-29T07:30:00.000-08:00

This was the best Christmas yet! Jill gets it this year...she knows it was baby Jesus' birthday and that Santa brought her presents and she could not wait

She asked Santa for a baby, but not a baby doll, she said she wanted a REAL baby. By Christmas morning she was ok with a doll, but really was hoping for a real one:)

Maybe next year Jillene!

She says all the time "It's Christmas time!?" with such enthusiasm!

We began our break with a visit from our best friends, Meghan & Robbie!

We had the best three days and made so many memories. We began with breakfast at the last place Meghan & I ate while we were pregnant and went from there to the airport where E took them on an awesome ride.

From there we took the kids home and E watched them while we went for pedicures and lunch with Jen. That night we went to see Christmas lights and ended up getting a house drawn carriage ride through the neighborhood.

Sunday we took the kids to my school to play on the playground, went shopping (again without kids) and then to eat the best pizza ever at Giordano'sand finished the day at Downtown Disney.

Were they even saw Santa!!!

(They saw him again at lunch the next day, he's everywhere!)

For our last day we headed to Tampa early, went to my favorite place to eat as a kid, Mel's Hot dogs, to my old elementary school to feed the ducks and play on the playground. From there we went on the wildest adventure... Nordstroms. Bet you've never been fitted for a new bra with two kids, two strollers, your amazing friend and the most patient sales person all in ONE dressing room. Meghan keep the kids busy feeding them gummy lifesavers...well at least while they lasted.

Then they took turns opening and slamming the door (of course I'm standing there top less while this is taking place). Oh yeah and there were people walking by the door too...yes it was lovely, memorable, a once in a life time experience! Meghan there is no one else I would have wanted to share such an experience with. Thanks for the encouragement to finally get sized by someone who knows what they are doing (and doesn't mind ALL of us), my boobies thank you too:)

I love you Bubie!!!

Our First Day Back in the Real World

2008-08-11T17:45:00.000-07:00

While we have had sooo much fun this summer, like all goods things, it must come to an end. That brings us back to the real world, no more sleeping in, breakfast at 10AM and naps when ever we want them. We can't even stay in our jammies all day, and the worst of all, I don't get to be with the cutest, most fun and amazing girl ever 24/7.

I've been dreading this day for weeks and today it's here and it wasn't that bad. I was actually excited to get back there and get my room together. I love my school, staff and teaching, but I love my girl more than ANYTHING and leaving her every morning will always be hard!!!

Here is our day in pictures...

6:30AM came way too early for this little girl

"What? I can't take may paci to school???"

"Seriously? Come on please????"

"Hold on and let me make sure I have everything!

1. Dora backpack......Check

2. Dora shirt.......Check

3. Dora Shoes....???

Check!!!!

Well Mommy, I guess I'm ready to go!!!

I got banana and my backpack and I'm ready to go!

What's up "Two's Room", I'm Jilli

and I'm BACK!!!!!

While she was having fun with her new teachers and eating her banana,

I headed off to school and this is what my classroom looked like...

Like my pink boxes???

This is a new room for me, so my stuff is in all the boxes and the

previous teacher's bulletin boards are still up.

I have LOTS of cabinets!!!!

The desk was in the middle of the room???

But not anymore!!!

I can't wait to post after I finish it.

All of the bulletin boards are going to be pink and black,

I can't wait:)

4:20 AM

2008-08-08T01:20:00.000-07:00

Yep that's what time it is...so why am I awake you wonder??? Well let me share.

This sweet Girl started wearing

these, three weeks ago today.

She insists on wearing them at night too, so I let her, and she did great!!

We had no accidents untill like 20 minutes ago:)

I couldn't sleep and was tossing and turning when Jill started to stir too.

She scooted in close and snuggled up to me and then......

she did it.....it was nice and warm and wet:)

Just what I wanted at 4 AM!!!

But really once in her first three weeks,

at bedtime or naps...I can't complain!!!

We blew up the air matress in the living room last night and watched HappyFeet and Toy Story. So when she warmed the sheets, I cleaned her and moved her to the living room and went back to clean the bed. As I was finishing the bed she came walking in with Maddie and said to me "me an Mannie need to watch cartoons, we no can sleep"

So I write this as Bean and "Mannie" watch cartoons:)

I love you more than anything Bean!!!

Good Morning Little Bug

2008-08-07T07:06:00.001-07:00

This morning while laying in bed about to

watch Bean's favorite new Cartoon...

The Wonder Pets!

In case you don't know...

The Wonder Pets is a cartoon about the adventures of a guinea pig, a duckling and a turtle, who travel the world in their flying boat and use teamwork to help other animals. It's Ming Ming, Tuck
And Linny too!

Well before her show started

Jill sing's me my favorite song...

it's her version of the song her Daddy sings

to her every morning .

His song goes...

Good Morning Lillte Bug

Good Morning Little Bug

It's Time to Wake Up

Good Morning Little Bug

This is her singing

Good Morning My Daddy

And here is

Good Morning my Mommy

I love You My Bean!!!!!

My Cuddle Bug!

I love you more than Anything!!!

Tag, Daddy, You're it....

2008-08-06T18:30:00.000-07:00

I LOVE.....

2008-07-29T16:33:00.000-07:00

I LOVE BEING TWO!!!!!

I love wearing Big Girl Panties and
my camisol too!

I love eating almost anything,
and I'll even share with you!

I love chocolate and so does he.

He's my Grampa, and he loves me!

I love giving Grammy kisses,

and steeling her soda.

Eating all her gum is fun

and so is peeing on her rug:)

This is Uncle John and he is so much fun.

We went to Key Largo together to play in the sun!

I LOOOOVE DORA

and band aids too!

I love Dora

and so does Roo!

(Bean and Roo at Diego Live!! Yes Dora was there too!!)

I love riding on my quad

and wearing my backpack!

I love mac-n-cheese

but I call it cheese-n-mac!!!

There are so many things I love these days

Jewelry, bracelets and my ring

And I tell my Mommy everyday

I love her more than anything!!!